Since I underlined acres of pages I am simply going to highlight the thoughts and impressions that kept cracking in my head during our week in prayer.
During the week I kept hearing these words of Christ – “I do nothing apart from my father.”
Whether Foster was writing about the activities and results of prayer, or reading about how to pray, or about enlisting the imagination, and shooting off flash prayers, I kept hearing over and over and over again “I do nothing apart from my father.”
I finally looked up the verse so I could actually dwell on the NIV words instead of the words from my clumsy paraphrase. The verse I was paraphrasing to myself is John 5:30 - "By myself I can do nothing; I judge only as I hear, and my judgment is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me." So, I was paraphrasing that verse.
Additionally, I think my mind was doing re-runs of John 5:19 as well where Jesus says, “Very truly I tell you, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does. For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, and he will show him even greater works than these, so that you will be amazed. For just as the Father raises the dead and gives them life, even so the Son gives life to whom he is pleased to give it. Moreover, the Father judges no one, but has entrusted all judgment to the Son." So I was paraphrasing that verse too. (Side note – that verse contains a crazy, deep beyond deep little comment/verse by Jesus by the way ----- MY FATHER JUDGES NOONE??? WHAT?!!??? – Good luck putting this messiah in a box. Wow.) So I was paraphrasing that verse too.
A third scripture (which may seem obvious to you) came to mind. John 15:5 - “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
This verse was a nice tie to the voice in my head – “Steve, in the image of the firstborn of creation, apart from my life, light, truth, body broken, blood shed – you can do nothing.”
Tonight a new scripture which is totally off the grid entered the discussion. Hebrews 10 and 11 with an emphasis on these verses - Hebrews 11:24-26 - By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter. He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt,
Hebrews 11:35-38 - Women received back their dead, raised to life again. There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection. Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were put to death by stoning;[e] they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.
I never really know (sorry) what God is saying but here's where I think He's been leading --
1 - The byproduct of prayer is greater trust of God’s story (and less trust in my puny, predictable Steve made story.)
2 - Greater trust in God’s story is called (almost literally) Faith (which comes by grace – had to get that in.:))
3. – Growth of the seed of faith creates pruning (John 15)
4. Pruning looks a lot like Hebrews 11:35-38.
In summary, I have been reminded that the abiding process/prayer has not placed on me conspicuous sufferings of Christ. In other words, I don’t think the author of Hebrews would conclude that in lieu of the persecutions and mistreatments – the world was not worthy of me.
God is not finished. Clearly. Clearly. CLEEAAARLY.
But what’s the next chapter in the story?
To quote Aslan – “I’ll be telling you all the time.” Oh boy.
To quote Owen Delgado – “Slap shot. Here we go.”
Steve, thanks for your encouragement to do nothing apart from the Father. So often I get frustrated with my inability to be disciplined because I forget that I'm not meant to be disciplined on my own strength (because I can't be disciplined on my own strength) but to trust in His strength to pull me into deeper intimacy in spite of my weaknesses.
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